A Note and Some Discussion Points from Ann

In If You've Raised Kids, You Can Manage Anything, I wanted to demolish the condescending stereotypes that still surround the work of raising children. We still have this idea that "family" and "work" are two totally separate spheres, and that attention to one somehow detracts from performance in the other. I sometimes think that people who have spent years with their kids are painted with a scarlet letter that brands them as not "serious" or "tough" or "dedicated" enough to succeed in the workplace. But there is absolutely no evidence of this. On the contrary, there is plenty of evidence that managing complex family relationships successfully makes one better equipped to handle all of life’s challenges.

So my idea was to change the conversation from work/family conflict to work/family synergy. Hopefully, the book can give mothers and fathers greater confidence in their skills, and open employers’ eyes to the hidden talents that parents can bring to the table.

Here are a few discussion points and questions to think about as you read the book:

1. Why is it assumed that "working at home" is easier than going to the office?
2. In what ways does our idea of the "good parent" match our concept of the "good leader"? How do these images differ? Are there more similarities than differences?
3. What skills do you feel that you in particular have learned as a parent?
4. Do you think you could convince a superior or employer that those skills are relevant? Would this be easier in certain fields?
5. Is the denigration of parenting skills a particular problem for women, or does this bias also affect stay-at-home fathers?

Thanks for participating in MOTHERS Book Bag,

Ann Crittenden